27 ways Yodel brings people together on Twitter

Followers on Twitter will know I’ve had two run-ins with Yodel this Christmas. On the first occasion, the delivery man didn’t knock or leave a card. It was only when I’d checked online I realised my parcel had been delivered to a house down the street. The customer services woman was surprised something like this could happen.

Had she looked on Twitter, she wouldn’t have been.

Then came my appalling attempt at sales shopping on Boxing Day. Gap sent the order out via Yodel. Nothing arrived. I checked online at 2.40pm and by chance the Yodel website told me it had been delivered at 2.34pm. Which was a surprise as the doorbell didn’t ring, no card was left and a quick check of the nearby neighbours revealed no parcel left there.

Yodel’s call centre people – who operate on a scale between friendly but useless and incompetent and rude – insisted I’d signed for it. I rang again, and was told it was at a house about five minutes walk away. Only it wasn’t. As I write this, Yodel are still to tell me where my parcel is because they are waiting to interview the driver, and they don’t work New Year’s Day.

But I’ve found my parcel. Or rather, a house down the street did. In the box they sell eggs from at the end of their drive. Silly me, why didn’t I think to look there for the parcel I’d never signed for which apparently was at a house up the street.

Still, I used to think that few things unite people quite like Christmas. Or a good Cup run. But it appears, searching for Yodel on Twitter, nothing unites people quite like having to deal with Yodel.

The 27 stages of Yodel Hell are outlined below. Merry Christmas. And thanks, Twitter!

1. So, how would you define a ‘safe place?’

yodelsafeplace

2. I mean, it’s not as if a TV would appeal to the light-fingered, is it?

yodeltv

3. But at least it was impossible to miss this one….

yodelagain4. But words fail me here…

yodelwords5. And here. Tripped up and it wasn’t your fault? Perhaps it was the delivery driver to blame…

yodelsubtle6. And Yodel will tell you that their computer system never gets it wrong…

yodelproof

7…. even if you have proof….

yodelsanta

8… that’s if you can get them to talk to you…

yodelcustomerservice

9… although it’s quite likely they’ll be talking about you:

yodelemail10. And lets be honest, nothing ever goes wrong:

yodelwrong

11. But you can’t beat the ‘guess where we left the parcel’ game…

yodelguess

12… apart from when they can’t be bothered to play the hide and seek game very well…

yodelwet

13.. or always ‘hide’ it in the same place, like always throwing it over a wall…

yodelthrow

14… or hide it in the places you’d least expect, or indeed, want, to find a parcel…

yodelcompost

15… especially if you intend to eat what is inside:

yodelvits

16. And then there’s the Yodel delivery driver who seems to think you could do with the exercise…

yodelinforgraphic17. And the driver who seems to write in code:

yodelcheating18. And the one that I hope is wind-up:

yodelforreal

19. Still, better than the ‘don’t knock the door, just run’ game, which can double up as the ‘Will you beat the binman to your parcel’ game…

yodelknock

20. And the ‘how damaged can a parcel be before we think to say sorry to the customer rather than just running off’ game…

yodelparcel

21.But you know when a game just gets boring?

yodelcrikey,png

22. Maybe cardboard just isn’t as strong as it used to be…

yodelmoredamage

23… and perhaps bubblewrap isn’t as good as it used to be either…

yodelbubblewrap24. But occasionally, drivers will offer useful advice…

yodelrattle

25….before returning to their carefully-packed vehicles (I really hope this one is a send up):

yodelvan

26. And this one isn’t for real, surely?

yodelbucket

27. And when the going gets tough…

yodelandfinallyQuite.

28. Makes you wish this guy was real, doesn’t it?

Happy new Year!

4 comments

  1. Oh yes, sooooooo familiar! I ordered one of the Tower of London poppies – I’d love to know which Mensa candidate gave the contract for delivery to Yodel. According to the website, it had been delivered. No card through the door. It turned into a mystery tour of the road to find out which neighbour they’d left it with.

    1. I’d try and do my job with an element of professional pride , which appears to be more than you can expect from Yodel.

  2. What a great collection. I had never heard of Yodel before today but this morning they left me a card, stating that my parcel has been left in a secure place in my “pigeon hole”. I have no such pigeon hole … just a front door!

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